“The mind of man is forever at the service of evil. Here at the Resort, our scientists strive to perfect new and obscenely creative instruments of
torturous death. Of course, for many of our guests, the old ways are still the best. Believe me our ancestors had imaginations that were positively diabolic.”
“Good evening and welcome back to the Resort Network’s reality show, ‘Positively Diabolic.’ I’m Christine and tonight, with the help of one of the Resort’s
staff of diabolically talented torturers, I’m going to demonstrate one of our ancestor’s most creatively fiendish instruments of torturous forms of execution,
Death by Impalement.”
Smiling, Christine continued, “This impalement post is a deceptively simple appearing wooden shaft, with its tip sharpened to a point, yet it’s still considered
one of the most diabolically barbaric forms of execution ever devised. This impalement post, in constant use since the earliest days of the Resort’s Vacation Club’s
founding, countless women have gone to their agonizingly torturous deaths upon it, their desperate dying struggles gradually polishing its shaft impossibly smooth.”
Pausing for a moment, “While having various shaped tips and shaft diameters, the steel impalement posts are common within the exclusive North Tower dungeons and
torture chambers, this simple wood post has one truly diabolic feature that sets it apart from all the others, its shaft gradually widens as it descends to the
floor. This minor difference adds an unexpected aspect to its victims agonizing torment.”
Pausing momentarily, as she felt a delightful sense of terror, “The gradually increasing circumference of the shaft, forces the victim’s cervical canal or anus to
continue to painfully dilate, as their body slips deeper unto the impalement post. This forced cervical or anal dilation, dramatically slows the victim’s descent down
the impalement post as compared with one of steel. On a steel post, once the tip pushes past your cervix or anus, no matter how hard you struggle against the inevitable
it’s rare for your impalement to take more than thirty minutes. However, on this wooden post, it takes most women over three times that long to be fully impaled and
with the average woman’s height being five feet four inches and wearing six-inch heels, by the time her heels reach the floor her cervix will have been dilated to a
diameter of just over six inches, or her anus to almost eight inches.”
A dark, almost eager look of evil anticipation appeared in Christine’s eyes, “Of course, personally. I'm hoping to last at least 48 hours after I’m fully impaled, a
death this agonizingly diabolic should always be savored...”